Pain - Where Does It Go?
The pain of losing contact with your child doesn't sit still. It moves. It reaches. It looks for a place to go. And almost universally, it keeps reaching toward the same place: the person who caused it.

The pain of losing contact with your child doesn't sit still. It moves. It reaches. It looks for a place to go. And almost universally, it keeps reaching toward the same place: the person who caused it.

There's a story most people tell about estrangement, but there's another version of the story, and it starts in a completely different place.

Control is what fear looks like when it needs somewhere to go. Underneath almost every angry response is something more vulnerable: fear, grief, shame, helplessness.

Reconciliation gets framed as the finish line, but what nobody tells you is that reconciliation can also be the beginning of a new kind of grief. One that is quieter, more confusing, and in some ways harder to explain.
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